This Road We Travelled
The road we travelled.
Oh the stories I could tell...there are tales of frogs and princes...white knights and villians...love gained ...love lost but they all led to the same destination. The relationship road...it can be bumpy..at times so bumpy you blow a tire...maybe two. Sometimes the engine blows and you end up on the side of the road waiting for the tow truck to help you pick up the wreck and haul it away to get fixed.
As with all else in life...in the end its what you make of the bumps in the road and who you chose to become. What has my road travelled taught me? I am alone enitrely responsible for my own happiness...no one else can do that for you. Nor should you put that responsibility on anyone else...that isn't their job.
I've learned that there isn't anything I can't do on my own.
I've learned that I'm quite happy in my own company and don't ever feel alone.
I've learned to be content with who I am and what I have to offer.
I've learned that personally we have to continue to challenge ourselves and to grow.
I've learned that finding someone who appreciates who you are and what you have to offer is imperative.
I hold the same principles to my main relationship...my partner...my husband...my new life. I carry it through in all that I do in all other primary relationships in my life. I surround myself with those that exude the positive not negative...that support not judge.
In my amazing husband, I have found the ying to my yang. He gets me, he always has. In knowing my independent spirit ...he appreciates what I bring to the table and encourages me at every step. This is what a life partner should do, and I've waited a very long time to find this gem.
It's not to say that we haven't had our ups and downs. We have, in fact, were apart for five years. We started dating in 2008, he was my third date on Plenty of Fish. In this series of three dates (and my first time on POF) and three fellas and one week on POF, I found my guy. The first guy, I set up with one of my besties (and they are still happily married), the second guy looked like he rolled out of a laundry basket and spoke bitterly about his ex-wife the entire lunch, my third, was Greg. Never looked back. We spent three years together and then decided in order for our lives to grow in an upward direction, it needed to do it separately. We both had things that we had to accomplish, but on our own. It wasn't that we didn't love each other way back then, it's just we needed to grow in different directions.
Off my man went to Vancouver to build his business, and I began my own journey.
My life was full, three kids, a full-time job, my entrepreneurial spirit tugging away at me, I dated, but not much. What I found was quite simple, I always compared the newest frog to Greg. He still outshone them all, there were many a time I asked myself why timing in life is so off. I have learned now in my wizened years, that again, everything happens for a reason. When the planets align, things fall into place when they are supposed to and not a minute sooner.
I believe to my core that the growth and experiences that we both had during our time apart is what brought us back together. We had to do that to get to this place that we are at now. We both have an entirely new appreciation for each other, our life and we sure don't take any of it for granted. We do feel like we missed out on those five years apart, but perhaps it wouldn't have been as fabulous as it is now. Hindsight, as we all know is always 20/20. Again, everything happens for a reason.
When we decided to get back together, we decided that we weren't going to waste another minute, being apart for so many years was enough. We already knew every detail about each other, the good, the bad and the ugly and we still loved each other. The bonus part was, all of my friends and family already knew him and loved him, he was never out of any of our hearts or minds. That made getting married a no brainer. And ... as you all know, that's exactly what we did, and what a beautiful wedding it was. If you haven't seen the Wedding Extravaganza then check out the blog!
We have had a long distance relationship since then. My kids and I live here in Winnipeg, and my hubby lives and works in Vancouver. Most people freak out about this. We don't. We aren't 16 anymore and the "I'll die if I don't see you" sentiment is ridiculous and so not practical. And ... we are practical.
We both have very busy lives and love it so much more when we can get the chance to be together. When you are in a trusting relationship, what is there to worry about. I'm far past that kind of stuff anyhow. The way that I look at things is simple, what's going to happen will happen. I continue to do my best and hope for the best. I must say, I do always feel that I'm a 100% confident in my relationship. I also don't waste up any positive energy wasting time on worry, jealousy and the such. I do not have the where with all to put up with such low vibration feelings.
Society has a judgemental view on long distance relationships. Most people I knew were kinda like what the hell? Truth is, it's about the people that are involved, and I guess for us, we have an end goal that we are working towards so our perspective is different. At the end of the day, it's no one else's place to judge, and when people on the outside are looking in and don't understand, it just doesn't matter. Do what is right for you in your own relationships, what anyone else thinks doesn't mean a thing.
Be happy, and I suggest waiting until the right partner comes along, don't settle.
#fairytalesdocometrue #Cheg #McMusclesandtheMrs
20/3/2017 03:09:08 pm
Great blog. Life is what you make it and you have to work at it.
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Let me not be judged by what I have and have not accomplished but by the remarkable children I have raised. Mother, Business Consultant, Entrepreneur, Designer, Artist.
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